Haunting Memoirs 3.

Prefects are all conformists. Stooges. Puppets. So were ours. They always bent so low to dance to the obscene tunes of the school administration. They always sniffed for trouble in us. They always had distaste in everything we did. Be it good or bad. They worked hard to deliver us to teachers for thrashing. Otherwise how could they be perceived as working? Serving the school.

Prior to the introduction of the voting system, prefects were always imposed on us. But this still thrives to date. Really! Teachers bend laws, rig and smuggle small-headed mugs into student leadership. The tragedy is when the subjects to be served are all big-headed. Damn. How can a fellow who hardly clicks in class; who ever lies to examiners and ends up scoring miserable marks order around his counterpart whose intelligence could easily outdo a teacher's? Impossible. Only an intelligent mind can lead intelligent minds. And it is with reference to this that I always honour the one Muheshimiwa. A fellow bighead. Though imposed on us, he was the only guy who spoke what we yearned to hear. We listened whenever he talked. For everything that forth came was absolute wisdom. That was in 2008. The year of the first harvest.

Some prefects mistook themselves to be small gods. They threatened and scared us. To them, you were either a friend or enemy. It was damn expensive to afford friendship. It was hellous to be an enemy. They exercised authority in totality. One of these was Mariko. The headboy. He used to vomit alot of Shakespearean nonsense till we complained. Teachers veered into sixes and sevens. Damn. Fancy that! Cool.

Mariko was the best prefect ever. Best of the best. Though only at the onset. He had mastered the art of rhetoric at the time most of us could hardly utter a word in the queen's tongue. Except the usual 'yes' and 'no'. Sometimes he could address us until the principal only dismissed us-- instead of giving his long, boring and disjointed speech! So Mariko advocated for strict observance of the School Language Policy. Damn. How on earth could it happen? We cursed. We loathed it. We resented him. Most often, we enjoyed eating words in mother tongue-- the best we could as if they had been spiced with palm wine.

Only Vicky put Mariko in his right place. Though only for while. He elated the god of mother tongue; and we joyfully worshipped it. He swore to bring an ox-plough and plough Mariko with it. Should the latter do anything stupid. He cooled. Vicky meant business. No one fucked with him.

Vicky and Felo were evil geniuses. Too bad they came before their time. Mukuyuni was thriving on old-fashioned ideas, barren ideologies and cowardice (on our part) when they exhibited some radical tendencies. They drank like fish and smoked like chimneys. Infact sometimes Vicky used to ask for permission to go home and come back whilst sober. A nasty fellow. Fancy that! Anyhow, together with Yakubu, they slightly shook the foundations of the existing system. We denied them support; we're choking with cowardice then. Infuriated, the administration dealt with them ruthlessly. They suffered from a bout of frustration. Mukuyuni wasn't a haven for radicals. They left. However, Yakubu remained to race with us. I respected him and still do. He was the only guy suspended for criticizing our teacher of chemistry for crude teaching. Something none of us could afford. Most of us were busy gathering unhonourable suspensions for making noise, rudeness, seducing and loving girls...

Mariko's successor was Anto. A nasty and indifferent fellow indeed! His counterpart-- the head girl was Sara. A very humble, quiet and God-fearing lass. She was also the C. U chairperson. Whenever she sung and preached, I felt like going to heaven there and then. Her heart was so cool like fresh milk. Many men stalked her; dying for her. It's a pity that no one merited.

I can't honestly forget other angelic gems in our class. Martha Mukopi, Lilian Edowan, Rael Naulikha, Maurine Wabuge, Rose Nyongesa, Loy Mamati, Lucy Wachilonga, Linet and Josephine Kimani are just but a few. They made us men. They made us not regret our going to Mukuyuni. May God bless them. May they live long to see there grandsons' grandsons. May they grow beards! Damn. Moreover, I can't enjoy the present sweet nakedness and fear for the sad fortunes of tomorrow without remembering Kuka Lukibisi and Kuka Makokha. The former was the first guy to grow and keep a beard. So proud of it was he that he always stroked it when talking to teachers. They always felt embarassed. They left him alone. Morever, he had once masqueraded as a seller of '' kelukelela ''-- the charm that lulls women to die for men. The latter was a professional liar. Professor of Lying & Falsehood. But he repented afterwards. It's no use to busy live on lies. Unschooled and colourless lies. His heart was scrapped clean. Today he insults the devil and incites the Old Man Above with unwavering zealousness. Damn Prof.!